Thursday, September 6, 2012

icrack, camels, and maxi pads? Oh my.


I'm having one of those days where I can't even form a complete sentence, let alone type one out.  I have 4-5 different blog posts started on my iphone note pad right now, but I just can't seem to make any of them work today.  Honestly i'm doing you a huge favor by not posting any of them.  They are painfully bad.  As in trying to rip an upside down maxi pad off an unshaven vagina bad.  So, what do you do when you are too tired and dysfunctional to write a complete blog post?  You write a blog post about your inability to blog, lol!

School started this week which means absolutely no freaking sleep for me.   I drive 3 kids to 3 different schools so my day starts at 7 am (okay more like 7:30).  Since I don't actually have to get out of my car to drop off my 8th and 10th graders, I literally drop them off in my pj's, no bra, and hot mess hair. Hmmm, perhaps I should be walking them inside, lol!  I know what you're thinking right about now,  "Seriously? This bitch gets to sleep in until 7:30 and thinks she has it bad?"   Well, that would be the case, if I didn't have a little thing called insomnia at night. I blame many things on this….Twitter, Facebook, the iphone (which should be renamed icrack because once you touch it you can't put it down), my 2 year old who frequently wakes up throughout the night, a husband who pesters me for sex the very second the kids fall asleep.   Speaking of this, I just wanted to let you men know that reverse psychology seldom works on a 34 year old woman.  I know you're trying to be sly when you say, "It's okay baby.  I know you're tired.  We don't have to do it tonight".  I can tell by the look on your face when I respond back with, "Okay, well i'm going to bed then", that it didn't quite turn out the way you expected, did it?

Really, that's all I got for you today.  I'm just having one of those blah blogging days where I try to be creative and funny but the only thoughts running through my head are, "Wow, i'm so tired that i'm actually seeing spots. Neat" or "I'm pretty damn sure Peanut has a crappy diaper because the entire house reeks like poop (his diapers could knock over a camel), but i'm going to pretend that I can't smell it for just a minute longer".




21 comments:

  1. Ahahaha I love this post! Love the honesty!

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  2. Creative AND funny. I totally understand the "not being able to form a complete sentence" kind of day. I have them all the time. ALL the freaking time. Here's to a better night's rest tonight!! :)

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  3. hahaha, I'm quite familiar with the good ol' pretend-I-don't-smell-the-poopy-diaper trick...

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  4. This might be my favorite ever!!! From the hairy gynas to the kid who doesnt sleep to the sex pestering. Dayum. Same life. I LOVE IT!!!

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  5. Wow, thanks ladies! I was so not even expecting any comments on this one today, lol! You just made my day!!!!

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  6. Hahaha. I just found your blog from the Friday chaos hop and I'm glad because I sooo keep saying I want 5 kids and everyone is telling me I'm crazy! (we are on our first) lol - and I came here and read "providing birth control for the entire neighborhood" hahaha love it. Newest follower! Maybe I can learn a few things from you!

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    1. Thank you! Glad I could help with your family size decisions! LOL!

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  7. You might not feel funny but you still are.

    Oh, and those spots? Um, you do know you have polka dots on your blog, right? =)

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  8. Oh my goodness, found you on Friday chaos and I am snort laughing over your last few posts and I keep getting weird looks from my husband.

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    1. Thanks Leslie! Happy to hear I made you laugh :)

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  9. The wings! Its the damned wings on the maxipads that are always rippin' hairs! I get it ... I so, so get it.

    Just found you on the TGIF bloghop and am a new follower. Hope inspiration finds you soon, but if this was a shitty post, I can't wait to read your non-maxipad ones. :)

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    1. LOL!!!! How could I forget the wings? Thanks for following :)

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  10. blah days = tons of giggles for me. =)

    Aloha,
    I'm so late, late, late but I'm following ya now from the GFC hop. If you're up for a bit of a ride, I'd love it if you'd join me at localsugarhawaii.com where we're riding the wave of life one teensy tinsy adventure at a time. AND this month we're launching our little etsy shop with giveaways galore. 'hope you'll join the fun...

    xo,
    Nicole
    localsugarhawaii.com

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  11. Hi!

    I'm stopping in from Friday Chaos! I am one of the co-hosts and I'm so glad you linked up!

    I hope you're having an awesome Friday!

    -Alexis
    www.livingthewifestyle.com

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  12. awwww hehehe i hate those days where i just can't seem to write/think at all lol spray some Febreeze and you'll be alright xoxoxo It was so good meeting you today! Looking forward to more of your posts!!! xoxoxoxo

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    1. LOL! Note to self…buy some Febreeze! I had fun chatting with you today! Yay for new friends!!!

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  13. You're still funny even with writer's block! You should see my posts-that-don't-turn-out posts. They are seriously embarrassing. Hope you manage to get some sleep soon. Step away from the iphone... ;)

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  14. This has been me for the past MONTH! I can't string a coherent sentence together with a dictionary, a yard of yarn and super glue. Except you are still freakin funny and not all der...der...like I am! Thank you so much for making me laugh for the last few hours! xoxo

    Tracy @ Momaical

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