Monday, March 4, 2013

The in-laws are coming

Kind of like the sky is falling, the sky is falling, i'm sitting here screaming, "Oh my GAWD the in-laws are coming!!!"

They are due to arrive either Thursday or Friday from out of state.  One would think we would know when they were actually scheduled to arrive, right?  Well, they told my husband their travel plans and whenever I ask the hubby when they are coming he shrugs and says, "I don't know. Friday. Or Thursday. Or maybe Friday. I'm not sure."   When his grandparents came to stay with us for a week from Vegas, we were literally sitting down eating dinner on a Tuesday (convinced they were coming on Thursday) when the door bell rang at 7 pm and standing at the door were his grandparents, with bags in hand.  It was one of those nightmare comes true situations where your house is in shambles and you have nothing in your fridge except an old container of margarine, a half empty gallon of milk and something furry in the cheese drawer because you were preparing to do a massive pre-company grocery run.

I enjoy my in-laws visits but I seriously get a little sick to my stomach when I know they are going to be stepping foot inside of my home.  They are neat freaks.  I know everyone thinks they know a neat freak, but seriously they are OCD clean.  As in their shower tiles (and grout) are so flipping white i'm convinced they never actually use their shower.  I don't even know how you get it that clean other than replacing it with brand new tiles and grout.  My MIL actually lived with us a few years ago.  I learned a lot of things about her like it's pointless to even load the dishwasher because she will come up behind you and completely re-arrange it.  And then there's the panty.  Wowzers, the pantry!  Our pantry was so freaky organized that even my dad came to visit once and was like, "What the hell is up with your pantry?"  Yeah, it was like that old Julia Roberts, Sleeping with the Enemy movie where she opens her cupboards and all of her canned food was stacked with the labels turned a certain way.   My SIL and I would occasionally have fun with her though.  We would mix items from the pantry to see if she noticed and I swear within a few minutes, things were pretty much returned to their original place.

So, yeah, they are coming in a few days and my to-do list is ridiculous.  The bathrooms need cleaned, floors need mopped, carpets need vacuumed, and all the crap organized and put away. Piece of cake when you have five kids and no time to clean, right? Kill me now. I should clarify that my house is far from Hoarders and when you walk in it looks quite clean until you start snooping around.  Yeah, there is lots of deep cleaning that needs to be done and the clock is tick, tick, ticking!

Don't worry this is NOT my house….
THIS is my house
I should be able to get it done by Thurs. No problemo. 
Okay, okay. Neither of these pics are my house and that was a very BAD joke and very insensitive to people who hoard. Save your hate mail. Unless your in-laws are coming to visit, I don't want to hear it.  I get a "My in-laws are coming so I can be offensive" pass for the week. Or month. Or year. 

Instead of the hate mail, please do send me lots of luck, positive thoughts, and lots of chocolate that I can get it all done.  No, screw the chocolate!  I forgot my MIL tisk, tisks anyone over 100 lbs and i'm the heaviest i've ever been so please no chocolate.  But booze is always welcome.  Yeah, just send that.  Lots of it.  And fast because the in-laws will be here on Thursday.  Or Friday.  Or maybe on Thursday.


11 comments:

  1. Good luck, sounds like you're gonna need it. I'll do a sympathy shot for you. One now, on learning the news, one on Thursday, in case they come, one on Friday cause they'll either be coming or will already be there . . .

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  2. Ha! Good Luck! Maybe the MIL will clean the house while she is there :)

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  3. Hahaha ... Good luck girl! maybe you should hire Merry Maids to save your sanity!

    ¤´¨)
    ¸.•*´
    (¸¤ Lanaya | xoxo
    www.raising-reagan.com

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    1. Love this post ~ that picture with Arnold is the best!

      Thank you for linking to Raising Imperfection.
      Please come back Friday to see if you were featured. :)

      ¤´¨)
      ¸.•*´
      (¸¤ Lanaya | xoxo
      www.raising-reagan.com

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  4. I am horrified when my neighbor shows up unannounced. I don't know what I would do if house guests arrived two days before I was expecting them. Good luck, girl. You're gonna need it!

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  5. Good luck! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Oh yeah, better you than me :D I suggest you by a real pretty flask if you haven't done so already. LOL
    Jae Mac, I'm Just Sayin'...(Damn!)

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  6. Too much! My ILs live in a tiny house, so they are also neat freaks. My FIL came over once for a couple of days - cleaned the entire house and the garage. He said he was bored. I feel for you.

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  7. My in-laws are dead. And they were hoarders. HA HA just kidding. They are in fact dead, but I made up the hoarding thing. Sorry, it's late. Hang in there! Don't tell my husband I made an inappropriate hoarding joke about his dead parents. He'd kill me. And then tell people I was a hoarder.

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  8. I am very thankful that my inlaws live close enough so they won't ever be overnight guests.

    Thank you for linking up to Raising Imperfection!
    Make sure to check back on Friday to see if you were featured.
    Leslie

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  9. Go with God, my friend. So funny, I think men have a code of ethics as far as scheduling goes. I get the same thing from my husband. "Oh...I dunno...". So frustrating. This was hilarious and make no mistake; I do not laugh at your pre-inlaw invaded suffering. But I kind of relate. My mother is all kinds of crazy clean. You could literally eat off of her garage floor. Yes. The garage. Stock up on the wine and good luck!

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  10. Oh my goodness! I know EXACTLY how you feel and I'm so sorry. Please keep us posted and let us know you survived. The anticipation of the in-law visit is second only to death by fire for me. Yeah, our relationship is that good. Anyway, go get 'em with that cleaning!

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