Monday, December 17, 2012

How do you blog with a broken heart?

Thursday night I was sitting at a painfully, horrendous choir concert for my 13 year old daughter, gigging to my hubby about the interesting musical selections, and the not so flattering, humpty dumpty style dresses the choir director picked out for the girls. I was making lots of "Oh, i'm SO blogging about this tomorrow" comments. I had the blog post all written out in my head. It was going to be witty and hilarious and I couldn't wait to post it.

Instead I woke up Friday morning to one of the most horrific and disturbing acts of violence this country has ever seen. Beautiful, precious, innocent lives were taken in a cruel and inhumane way.  And my heart broke into a billion little pieces. And it's still broken and I don't know how to fix it.  I truly have no words to adequately express how completely devastated I am for the family and friends of the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting.  I would also like to add the two victims of the Clackamas Town Center shooting that happened right here in Portland, just a few days prior. My heart just hurts, my eyes burn from the tears, and I haven't been sleeping well.  These past few days have been a blur. I feel myself going through the motions of the day, but I couldn't really tell you what I did at the end of the day, if that makes any sense.  I'm sure there are lots of things I probably should say, but I just don't have the words, so this will have to do.

Life On Peanut Layne will be observing the Blogging Day of Silence on Tuesday to show my love, respect and support for the victims lost.   I promise I will be back with my usual humor and ridiculousness soon, but I still need some time.  Some time to just be.

Here is a beautiful song that I love and wanted to share: 


  1. It is so hard thinking about the school shooting and it just breaks your heart thinking about the victims and the family. I can't help thinking about it everyday. God Bless them all and May God heal their wounds. I am your new follower by the way via blog hop.

    Adin B

  2. that is how I have felt. everything else seems so trite. I know I'm treading on hallowed ground here by the mere mention of Gun Law reform (having grown up in OR, and now live in the CT county of the shooting) ... but when is enough; enough? when do we all get serious about stopping this?

  3. Your words are perfect. There is so much pain. I yelled at my son Friday morning over a puzzle and have hated myself ever since. I'm not sure where or how we go on from here....Blog when you can. Your humor will be appreciated in the days and months to come.

  4. I have cried every single day since the shooting for those poor children. My daughter is the same age as those who lost their lives that day, so this is hitting me even harder because I can't help imagine 'what if?'. Friday afternoon, I picked my kids up from latchkey and held them tight - right there in the gym. We got home and I cried mostly all afternoon. That evening, they were in their play room fighting over some silly toy (or something)...and rather than hollering at them to get along, I closed my eyes and thanked God that they were here with me and able to argue with each other. I found this link on another blog I read, and it brought me to tears, again...I wanted to share its preciousness with you.
    God Bless you all and I hope in light of all these recent disasters, you are able to have a Merry Christmas with your loved ones.


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