Friday, February 1, 2013

Blog Friends Vs Real Friends: Guest Post by Sorry Kid, Your Mom Doesn't Play Well With Others


Hi! I am Ashley. I blog at http://www.sorrykid.blogspot.com/. I have 5 kids, yes you read that right, and am pregnant with number 6- I know I know, I am an overachiver...Ha, if you know me that is far from the truth. Anyway, I am toning it down a little for you today. Grab a cup of coffee and pretend I am sitting across the table.

Blog Friends Vs Real Friends

Blogging is much more than putting words onto a computer screen and pressing publish.  Blogging is sharing your life with strangers, to anyone who wants to take the 5 minutes to know more about you and your family. Raw thoughts take a lot of courage to put out there, for anyone to judge or mock (all under the heading of Anonymous). Most people find it hard to describe themselves in 3 words, lets try 150+. Bloggers have to be willing to put the real them onto paper, you can hide behind a screen for a little while but sooner or later if you are fake you will be figured out. Bloggers are like you, but they tell the truth- and let it all hang out regardless of what other people will think. There are no cutesy Facebook posts about my sweet little perfect angel who just pooped in the potty for the first time at 8 months. You get the raw deal, my 4 year old just crapped himself AGAIN and then decided the living room would look lovely in a shade of shit brown. Every once in a while you get a random thought that pops into our head, those are usually the ones that most people just keep to themselves, not us, we bare all. Bloggers have balls.

Real people, you know, it is a hodgepodge. Some people are awesome, most are fake. You don't ever really know what is going on in someone's life unless you are a freak and creep around looking in windows or they are oversharers on Facebook. Which I have seen way too often, every cold or sprained ankle makes the newsfeed and when their kid actually makes a doodie in the toilet the picture of the load in the bowl is being paid to be promoted. But in general, real feelings aren't being put out there. Real thoughts are kept in, the courage to type them is smothered by fear of what people really think of them.

Being a blogger isn't just about the courage it takes to publish the real story, it is about building friendships. I have been so lucky to find a group of women who are supportive and want just as good for me as themselves. That doesn't happen very often, as most women are so judgmental that if you would say your real thoughts you would be outed from the group. They take nothing less than perfection. Sometimes real life is sad, and people in your real life may care (family not included, they almost always care) or they may run away, because broken is not on their checklist on hand made paper with perfect calligraphy. Those people suck. We don't like them, the pretty well-dressed Martha Stewart's can just go to hell.

Anyway, having made these friendships is like getting a second chance at High School, but we all don't care what you wear (we dig the homeless chic look too) and the level of our friendship doesn't depend on who we are dating (unless it's Adam Levine, and then we will hate you). We care about each other because we want to, not because of the numbers next to their name. This blogging community has made many of us feel normal for the first time in our lives. We now know that other people are just as random as us and we won't be compared to the Duggars for having a few more than the average number of children. (Even though mine now is going through a metro phase and thinks he should dress up ALL THE TIME. Seriously, he looks like he should be carrying a Bible and knocking on doors.) Anyway you get it, we have a community of friends...blah blah. So when one of us gets dealt a shit hand you know we are going to come together and do what we can, write. So you may be seeing more of me- lucky you, right? Until next time, I am going to sit on my couch and give the kids a nickel a piece to rub my feet and look up home remedies for Peanut...


11 comments:

  1. I LOOOOOVE this post! My blog friends "get" me more than my IRL friends....well with the exception of my irl bff but I have met THE most amazing people on earth through blogging.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is such a great guest post and SO real!

    xoxo
    Lanaya

    ReplyDelete
  3. I not only love this post, but I love that I get to call you my blog friend, Sorry Kid! I love that you always make me laugh. And let me know how you're doing with finding those remedies . . .

    ReplyDelete
  4. You hit it exactly right! That is one of the reasons I blog...I can just be me!! And the women I am in a group with are good people that will help you out. I haven't made a blogging bff yet, but know that I will eventually! Would love for you to check my blog out too http://iwouldnttradenothingformyjourneynow.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. Peanut is a lucky Lady that so many friends have rallied around her. This was fun... and anyone who can handle 5 and a bit kids is awesome in my book! Great post...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Came in for the blog hop and fell upon this post. LOVE it! Laughed my way through it all :)Would lkove for you to check out my starting blog at : http://waytomotherhood.blogspot.ca/

    ReplyDelete
  7. Abso-fucking-lutely hit that nail on the head! So true! We are all so lucky to have each other, homeless clothes, with our big balls, and all of it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Great post. I find it hard to put myself on a page, not because I'm trying to be fake but I don't open up to many people, including my husband. I'm a private person, but enjoy the ability to express some feelings on paper. I hope I'll be able to find those friendships too.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Awesome post. You are so right. I display more of myself on my blog or Facebook page than I do on my actual page. And, through blogging, I've met so many amazing and fantastic women and men, it's not even funny. I count them all among my friends and I cherish each and every one!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I LOVE this post Ashley! SO VERY true! How lucky we are!!!

    ReplyDelete