Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Guest Post by Snarkfest


A guest post from Snarkfest….

So word on the street is that Peanut Layne is laid up and taking some much needed rest time. I really hope that’s what she’s doing. She needs it. Did you know she’s got 5 kids??? Hell I need a nap after just TYPING that she’s got 5 kids. I’ve got 2 and can barely keep up. For example, last night my two kids both had something going on. 15 had a recording concert and 13 had a bloodbath basketball game.  Thank goodness my husband and I are able to tag-team. He took the game, I took the concert.  While sitting with my friend who only has one in middle school these days, she said thank goodness you only have two! Can you imagine if you had more? After I vomited on her lap, I thought about how in the wide world people with more than 2 kids manage. Let me rephrase that. How do parents manage when their children are involved in multiple activities all at the same time? How do they deal with shuttling kids from point A to point B? How do they deal with the guilt for going to one activity in favor of another?  And don’t even get me STARTED on those who don’t have someone else to rely on to help out, whether it’s due to divorce, death or just being a deadbeat.

Back when I was a kid (when we rode dinosaurs to school and we liked it) I wasn’t involved in much. I didn’t do Girl Scouts, no basketball, no volleyball, no drama club. I stayed after school once a month for French club but that didn’t really involve mom shuttling me hither and yon all the time. The most I relied on mom for was a ride to the skating rink or the basketball game but I always had to find my own ride home or hoof it. Nowadays there’s no way my kids could hoof it home from the high school 11 miles away on twisty, windy roads at night. To say that nothing could prepare me for the ‘plates in the air juggling act’ I’ve had to deal with would be an understatement.

A few weeks ago, 15 and 13 both had basketball games on the same night. And hubby was at reserves. Which leaves mom to be in two places at one time (a challenge I’m still working on perfecting).  Thank goodness for friends and neighbors who are happy to help out when you’re in a pinch. If you can procure a ride for one to and from her event, that frees you up to take the other one to and from her event. Except that now I get to listen to the melancholy wailing, whined to the tune of “Why are you going to her game and not mine??” Wow I love answering that question. Usually I respond with “Because I love her more than I love you”, which is sarcastic and totally (mostly) untrue. I love them both with all my heart and soul. I just love it when one gets her room clean more than when the other spends 3 hours texting instead of room cleaning like I asked. So is the rule: She who has the cleanest room gets mom’s attendance at her game? Maybe.  But what would I do if I had 3 kids, all involved in activities? 4?? 5???  I truly do NOT know how parents of more than 2 do this (unless you’re like, on Sister Wives and have one no good lousy rotten husband and 4 other sister wives who can help with transportation and ease that mom-guilt.) Maybe that’s what I need. If I have more children (GOD FORBID) I’m going to find myself a wife. Between the two of us, we’ll figure it out.

In the meantime, my hat is off to you parents of more than 2. And to you, Peanut Layne. I hope you’re feeling better soon so you can get up and chauffeur those 5 kids around! I’m going to go lie down and take a nap just thinking about that.

10 comments:

  1. I'm with you. When my kids were little (and my husband traveled one week every month) I used to say "I have 2 hands and 2 kids, I'll consider more kids after I grow more hands." I don't know how people with more kids than hands do it!

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    1. Good analogy, Karen. 2 kids/2 hands. That's enough!!

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  2. I don't know how any of you rockstars do it! You're amazing! Teri, those dinosaurs were so awesome, right? Except the days they ate my lunch...then I just wished someone would invent a school bus or a carpool ;) Great post!

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    1. LOVE the school bus, especially when my kids actually MAKE the bus!!

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  3. We had 3 on accident. :) And the youngest always complains "the boys have each other and I don't have anyone", so we got her a cat. Also. My husband is now neutered.

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    1. LOVE the cat as a friend/sister for your daughter! And good for you for getting the husband neutered. Is he housebroken? ;)

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  4. Agreed. When I rode a dinosaur bus to school, my only activity was basketball, and that was because my friend's dad was the coach and he said he would drive me home after practice and games. My dad came to a total of ONE of my games ever. My mom zero.

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    1. Oh Joy that's awful!!! At least you had your friends dad to look up to.

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  5. I respect those that have more than two, but I don't know how they manage either. I certainly don't understand the working single mom of multiple children. When I was working, I would come home exhausted, and struggle just to get my son to do his homework, eat, and put him down for a bath. Mine is only allowed to be in one activity at a time for now, he's 9. My parents did no shuttling at all, so I could stay late after school, but that was the extent of their desire to cater to me.

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  6. I could not agree more. I have two and I can barely keep up. I have no idea how people with more than that can do everything. I bow down to them!! They have to have mad organization skills just to carry out a normal day's activities!

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